Intellectual Resurrection

I guess it’s about time I started writing again, since I’ve always seen blogging/journal-ing as a form of articulating my thoughts.

Well, ‘not much thought’ some who know me might argue, after all, what’s thought to a man in green? or rather, what’s any intellectual association to a soldier? Many of my colleagues would embody the epitome of senseless, brainless individuals. I don’t mean their stupid but rather they don’t think. They process information, they don’t think, there’s a universe of a difference if you ask me between the two, thinkers and processors that is.

I choose to believe I’m belong to the former.

Apologies, I digress. Why the need for an Intellectual Resurrection? It’s for a variety of reasons, i must say, but none of which precedes the few reasons i would deem as axioms to which had incited me to want to start posting again.

1) I’ve in the the past 1 year been back in the service, peddling through a whole laundry list of mundane activities, that i reluctantly call my job, sometimes i wonder why do they need university graduates to do something so simple. It’s quite tedious and it definitely de-educates one.

2) In the past 1 yr, due to the nature of my job. I’ve gone back to spewing explicives so much that is seems like i punctuate my sentences with them. To me it seemed almost as if i’ve turned into a caveman, of limited grey matter to speak about, and my language lives as the testimont to that.

3) I miss writing, I really do, not just in the form of blogging, but i miss Journalism, Public Relations, Writing Papers. I miss all of that, that of which i used to pride myself as, things i had done for 4 years of my university life, things i had studied, practiced during my internship. I miss the professionalism, the thought, the effort and the stimulation and joy in brings me.

Well. It would seem like I’m still very much caught up in the past. I should be socialised to be used to my surroundings now. Maybe, maybe not. I was once having a conversation with my immediate boss. And I remember telling him.

I.B. (immediate boss): Kenneth how are things?
Me: Well going alright… though there are many things I’m still not used to. Like the way people and the organization functions. (after all it is the military, you have to more often than not bow down to those whom are higher ranked but not necessarily smarter more capable or superior to you in any other way).

I.B.: But you’ve been back for what? 8 months now. Surely, you’re starting to transit right?
Me: I have transited (I MEAN IT), but I don’t want to get used to the system. A system which promotes one based on time norms and not meritocratic reasons, a system which dictates more administrative (operations type job) as opposed to a challenging thinking job. A system which most of all I feel stifles me, because I’ve seen better.

I admit my views are that of a bitter person, angry, perhaps even sore. But nonetheless I have many other things to be thankful for with regards to my job.

- My immediate boss (He might not be the best boss one could ask for, but he cares for his people, he encourages, and most importantly he’s the kind of boss that gives his subordinates an ample amount of freeplay, of course dependent on the amount of confidence he has in the person, or at least that’s what i like to think since he gives me a huge box to run around in.)

- My big boss (This guy is perhaps one of the biggest reasons why i turn up to work everyday and not want to take a medical certificate and feign ill. The dude’s one of a kind, president scholar, good with people, and most importantly, he’s the type of person that listens and is composed no matter what happens. To be honest, due to the fact that i’m working directly under him for NDP really makes me happy. Haha, NO i;’m not gay. It’s just this man is really someone I look up to, and I feel like everytime we interact, I learn something new. Too bad he can’t be my boss for my entire career, or however short it might be)

- Friends – well this is pretty straight forward so i’d skip it.

On the issue or work, yes I detest most of it.I’d prefer slogging as a journalist, working hectic hours as a public relations profession in a reputable agency. But at the end, it’s all because the aforementioned jobs i’ve listed, all give me a sense of intellectual satisfaction. It shows me bit by bit through piles and piles of papers and hours of staring at the screen and even longer hours typing, that at the end. My writing, my works, my ideas, and its articulation makes a difference, it contributes to whether or not readers get  a fair depiction of what matters to them, or whether consumers think better of the client’s company, or whether a product is picked up in a store. And lastly,

It satisfies me.